Welcome to the craziness....

Thursday, October 12, 2017

Birds of a Feather...



So one way you can get involved in your kid's classroom (aka figure out which kids your kid will NOT be having playdates with...) is to go on a class field trip.

So when sign ups rolled out for my kid's field trips you better believe this Mama was on it.

You see, we are at a new school and I am starting over with learning the kiddos (and mamas) here in Nashville.

Speaking of which, I don't know if it's old age...or I am just that slow. But it is HARD to learn new people when you have been at another school for almost 10 years. I mean I can meet Sarah Jane's (they alllll have two names here...) mama on Tuesday at drop off and by pick up I am like...what's that kid's name and is that her Mama? Or did I meet her last week at the 6th grade social? Or is she the chick from flag football? Or is she the one who also moved to the school this year? Who am I? What am I dong? Is it Wednesday? Or is today Thursday? What is going onnnnnn!?!

Anyhoo, back to the field trip. So signups were posted and I jumped on it and managed to secure a spot on the first grade field trip to go bird banding.

Now, two things. Signing up for a field trip is similar to the Walmarts on thanksgiving night...ya gotta be quick to get the good stuff. And, what the heck is bird banding anyway!?! I mean we are in Music City...so does this mean we are going to see the Eagles!?! I mean who doesn't love a little Hotel California?!

Needless to say the school bus did not drop us off to see the Eagles. It dropped us off at the local park. And we were greeted by a realllllll friendly lady who informed the teacher that the parents needed to STAY OFF their cell phones on the field trip. I mean who is this lady!?! Does she not know that we cannot go a whole field trip without checking the Facebook...I mean without taking a picture of our kid?! Or instagramming little Johnny with his friend, Sarah Jane!?! I mean if we don't take a picture it didn't happen, right?!!

So after securing my spot at the back of the line (where I could safely check my social media without getting caught) our group headed to the bird capturing station. I have no idea if that it is really what this area was called, but it sounds official so we will call it that.

When we arrive, this little lady, probably my grandma's age, tells us she is gonna go see if she can catch a bird for our demonstration...

Of course I'm like, yeah right lady. You are just gonna go catch a bird... Like that's a realllll easy task.

She comes back five minutes later.

With a bird.

In a little pouch.

Like it was nothing.

Of course at this point I have to get out my illegal device and record the moment.

I mean this grandma like lady just went out and captured a little bird in her little pouch.

Who does that!?!

Anyway the little grandma lady has friends and they all gather around and proceed to handle said bird, check it's feathers, weigh it, tell us where it migrated from, tell us it's gender....all the while said bird is shrieking and carrying on like someone has snatched it out of it's natural habitat and put it into a little pouch.

They complete their demonstration by putting a little band (ahhhhhh, so that's what this is all about) around it's ankle, recording it's info and then they set it free....I have all ideas this bird went to warn the others about the grandma lady carrying the pouch...

Next up we moved to a station with some (very nicely) preserved dead birds. Think mounted deer on the wall. Only it's birds. Laying on tables. Where the children could see them...but not touch them. Yeah right. Someone hand me the hand sanitizer.

Our "nice" little tour guide lady tells all about the birds. Then takes questions from the audience...aka 1st graders. First up, little Johnny.

Yes little Johnny?

My dad shoots birds. He doesn't want them pooping all over the place.

Way to go little Johnny. Dad would be so proud!

Out of the mouths of babes....

Finally, we concluded our adventure by examining bird feathers with magnifying glasses. Again, first graders.

So each kiddo gets a magnifying glass to examine their bird feathers.

The "nice" guide lady wants each child to describe their feather.

We get some really good answers like:
-it's a feather!
-it came from a bird!
-I like feathers!
-Her feather is bigger than my feather! (*said in whining voice)
-My mom said we don't touch feathers because they carry staphylococcus. (note to self: have Jack copy off this kid...she seems smart)

As my eyes start to glaze over from all of the children's wonderful answers I spot something...little Johnny sitting off to the side angling his magnifying glass ever so carefully as to start as a small brush fire with a pile of sticks. (note to self: we will not be having any playdates with little Johnny)

And just as quickly as it started. Or not. The field trip fun has come to an end.

Needless to say all in all the bird banding field trip was a success and it really was interesting. Still trying to figure out how grandma captured that little bird in her little pouch...

Guess we'll never know...


**and just in case you were still thinking about Hotel California and the Eagles