Welcome to the craziness....

Monday, October 24, 2011

I'm back!

Hey y'all! I'm back!
I survived the trip to Charleston...the 9 hour drive and all the mayhem that is taking a "vacation" with three little people under the age of six. We all know it is no vaca, but more of an undertaking.

However, I am pleased to say, we actually had a great time! We frolicked in the ocean, went to the pumpkin patch, did a little shopping, did LOTS of eating...and got to "sleep in" (aka 7:30 instead of 7am...I'll take what I can get)

Well, needless to say there was LOTS going on at home while we were away.
Let's just say while the people are away, the fleas will play.
The fact is I think the fleas had an all out par-tay.
I am not sure who made the comment about rabbits and the ahem, shall we say..."reproducing" that they do...but they had it all wrong.
I am pretty certain the fleas turned on some Barry White, dimmed the lights, and had a little fun.
Did you know a flea can lay up to 50 eggs a day?!?!
Yeah, me either.
We were gone 6 days.

So, needless to say, here I sit waiting on the professional. I thought I could handle the fleas. But alas, I am at my mercy. I can not take it any longer. I am tempted to torch the house. Probably not the best idea.

I have vacuumed the entire house.
12 times.
Since yesterday.
All the small objects (non-furniture) are up off the floors.
The closets are cleaned out.
There is nothing under any of the beds.
The bedding has all been removed and bleached.
The floors have been mopped.
The food has been covered, removed, stored, etc...
The pets are still being boarded.
Let's just say if this doesn't work you may have to come visit me at the mental institute.

Speaking of institution...I had to go to the local Apple store while we were on vaca...I loathe that place. It also causes me angst that I feel like may lead me to be carted off to the looney bin.

I don't know what it is.
The blue shirts.
The people that work there speaking in intelligent Apple like sentences.
The people who come in and just hang out at those high top tables...what are they doing there anyway?!?!
The fact you have to make an appointment to be seen there. I mean come on...you aren't a doctor's office. Although I have certainly waited there for long periods of time just like at a doctor's office.

Anyhoo...the phone died. I needed a phone. So I had to suck it up and make my appointment.

The Apple store down there is in downtown so I am not as familiar with my way around. I did finally find it though and get situated in a parking garage a few blocks away.
I hustled the kids out of the car to get in there because the nice man on the phone told me if I didn't get there within 6 minutes of my appointment I would lose my place.
(6 minutes...really?!?! Why 6? That seems like an odd number to me....why not an even 10...I mean people run into issues, esp when coming from out of town...)

On the way in it was raining and I had flip flops on.
I don't know what it is about my old navy flip flops but they turn into ice skates in the rain.
I slipped on the sidewalk and got a big gash on my foot...and nearly dropped my youngest child.
Finally we found the Apple store and got in just as our sixth minute approached.
I hobbled in bleeding, checked in and asked for band aid.
After waiting a sweet eternity it turns out all I had to do was push the home screen button twice on my phone, close all the apps and voila it was fixed.
And this is why I am not Steve Jobs.
God rest his soul.

When we left the store I hung a left to head back to the parking garage.
Only I couldn't find the parking garage.
We circled the block 5 times.
I could NOT find the parking garage.
It was as if it had disappeared.
(note: this is probably why I should be committed...because I believed that I was going crazy...the parking garage had vanished!)

Needless to say after circling the block numerous times, dragging my poor kids with me, and making a detour into a CVS and bribing them with candy to persevere and push forward we made it to the parking garage...

I have no idea. It's as if it just magically appeared.

We got back onto the interstate to meet my MIL at the outlet mall north of downtown.

I am sure you won't be surprised when I tell you I was so flustered I looked up and we were headed south, to Savannah...

It was just that kind of day.

Many more vacation stories to come I'm sure...

If I am not institutionalized before then.

Have a wonderful Monday.


  1. wow. you poor thing. I was cringing just reading all that. Sounds like you need a vacay.....ALONE